I recently came across something I'd written back in 2005 when I was going through some major transformation. I had forgotten all about what I had written, but it released a recognition in my soul of where I was to how far I've come.
I was at a point in my life where I was extremely stressed; did not allow anyone in my life to help me outside my immediate family and had come down with chronic fatigue syndrome. Being a single parent with a house & car payment as well as bills, I was too stubborn to quit the job I'd had for 12 years. It all pushed me to have to take a leave of absence because I thought I was at the point of having heart problems. I could hardly walk due to weakness, had to hang onto walls and was breathing heavily. I had gone through 4 years previous to this of only sleeping 2-1/2 to 3 hours every night. You can imagine the condition I was in. Toward the end of my 6 week leave of absence from work, I wrote the following:
" I was stumped for any answers to anything I had questions to in my life. I sat slouched in the kitchen chair at my mom's house twirling a big button on a string watching it wind up tightly then unravel. I started relating my own thoughts to this button. how tightly would I had been in my life, afraid to let anyone near to touch me or help me and yet, I had no clue where the fear came from. Had I always felt so hurt all my life from the people I had met and the relationships I had been in? Was it them who had done things to me or was it me that allowed them into my life? While pondering these thoughts, I noticed a dove flew and landed on the ledge outside the window peering in at me, blinking her eyes while acting as if she was watching for my next thought. She then slowly started walking back and forth as if guarding the window. I stopped everything and concentrated on her. She stopped and looked me directly in the eyes. I slowly placed the string and button down, moved out of my chair and knelt on the floor by the window. She did not move her body, only her eyes to meet mine more intensely. As I moved more into comfortable position to focus on her, she lowered her body, cocked her head sideways and held the gaze. A small humming, but cooing type of sound came through the window. It was soft, embracing and sent me into feeling of tranquility. It was if she told me telepathically that I should become like her- trusting, soft, relaxed and embrace what life had to give to me. I acknowledged her message, letting her know it was understood. She stopped the gaze, the cooing and flew off the windowsill and out of sight. I tried to follow her with my eyes and even ran to the back door to see if I could see where she went. After a few minutes I noticed the gift and message she left behind...a gift to me. There on the windowsill was a small egg covered by a feather. The gift symbolizing the growth of a new life yet to break through, a new life that would take flight. I just had to embrace it. "
It makes so much sense that God would send me this kind of message. I am so happy that I acknowledged it, although I continued to go through up and down periods in my life, I now allow more help when I need it. I broke through the brick walls I hid behind and let whoever wanted to know me, know me. I am part of the God energy, here to share it. Why would I ever want to hide that? There is so much to give and so many blessings to receive in life. May you always listen to the messages that come to you in your life, whether big or small.
Blessings of divinity, Timelesssoul1
